Bathroom Awkwardness (Part Deux)

Dear Optimists,

More bathroom awkwardness? Darn straight!

This weekend the fiancee and I headed out to dinner to use a gift card someone gave her for Christmas. I excused myself to use the restroom (AKA said “I have to pee”) and went.

I go in, prepare myself to use the urinal, when a man at the other urinal RIPS a fart. Then another. And these weren’t quiet…these were loud, you-better-check-your-shorts, farts!

I finished up quickly and left. I sat back down at the table and filled her in on the adventure.
“I don’t know anyone else who has such odd bathroom trips,” she told me.

Love,
Den

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Bathroom Awkwardness

Dear Optimists,

How many of you know what a urinal is? Basically it’s a toilet to pee in that’s attached to a wall. It’s for men…stand-up pee-ers only. Although I have seen a funny movie or two where a girl uses one. There are little walls between each one and they stand in the middle of a bathroom wall so that, technically, while a man pees, everyone else who walks in can see him from behind. They look like this:

Well, men walk up to them, unzip, whip it out and let the pee go. Nobody sees anything but their back. It’s quicker than using a stall and saves water. But last week after a movie I ran in to take a quick leak and there’s a boy, I’d say around ten or so, peeing at one. The difference is, instead of unzipping, he just pulled his pants down to his ankles right there in the middle of the public bathroom! I quickly looked away and felt VERY awkward at a bare ass in the bathroom. Consequently, I decided to hold it in.

Love,

Den